


Part of Fun Julia

by left_handed_moth



Category: The Magicians (TV)
Genre: Bodily Functions, F/F, Ficlet, Fluff and Humor, I promise this is cuter than it is gross by a significant margin
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-18
Updated: 2019-07-18
Packaged: 2020-07-08 02:38:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 688
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19862143
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/left_handed_moth/pseuds/left_handed_moth
Summary: “Jules, what was that?”Julia smiled.  “I think everyone in the world knows what that was.”“Yeah, but what *was* that?”A small, human moment.  Which is to say that part of being in a relationship is that sometimes your significant other does a giant fart in front of you and that's just how it is.





	Part of Fun Julia

**Author's Note:**

> If you want to situate this in the timeline, the apartment I pictured was the one from s2. So either you can pretend this is that but without Reynard, or a light moment within that period as it happened in canon, or it's just post-canon. Whatever.

It was loud enough to get Kady sit up straight and turn her head. It was long, and didn’t sound entirely healthy. If Kady had to spell it out, it would be mostly the letters  _ p, l,  _ and  _ r. _ Maybe a  _ t _ or two at the end.

"Excuse me," said Julia, from the windowsill. She didn't sound at all surprised at what had just come out of her.

“Jules, what was that?”

Julia smiled. “I think everyone in the world knows what that was.”

“Yeah, but what  _ was _ that?”

“It was a toot.” Julia’s voice was all bubbles.

“Toots make a toot sound. That was something else.”

“Fine,” said Julia. “It was a  _ ripper. _ I  _ blew ass. _ _ Cut a big one. _ Better?”

“Ew.”

Kady shook her head, slouched back down into the couch, and went back to her cheesy murder mystery. The protagonist had gotten knocked unconscious again when the smell hit.

“Babe, that’s rank. You sure you’re feeling okay?”

Julia shrugged. “We order in a lot of junk. You eat it too.”

Kady couldn’t say it didn't affect her sometimes, but she was pretty conscientious about stepping into the bathroom or onto the fire escape, or just walking away at the normal Manhattan sidewalk pace.

Julia continued. “Honestly, though, I am pretty gassy right now. Feel my belly.”

She pulled her leggings down past her navel. Kady didn’t think anything looked different, but she was a bisexual, not a doctor. She wasn’t keeping close track of day-to-day changes in her girlfriend’s body, she just knew it was hot.

“I said feel, dummy. Ogle-time can happen too, though.” Kady hadn’t realized she was staring.

Kady walked over and pressed her hand to Julia’s belly. A request for touching from Julia was always appreciated, but Kady genuinely couldn’t feel any difference.

She shook her head at Julia.

Julia smiled. “Well, when we’re middle-aged and living in a nice house in Westchester, you’ll have enough experience with what I feel like that you’ll be able to tell.”

“Why the fuck would I want to live in Westchester?”

“Fine. The Catskills somewhere. Get a little cabin and drive around the back roads.”

“I like it here. We’ve got MoMA and really good Chinese food. And I wouldn’t fit in out in upstate hicksville.”

“Fine.” Julia leaned her hips to the side. This second fart wasn’t nearly as dramatic, but it wasn’t nothing. “You’re in for more of those, by the way.”

“Tonight?”

“And for the rest of your life. The barrier’s broken. I’m free. Master has given Dobby a sock.”

Kady laughed in spite of herself, and shook her head. "Well, Master is getting away from the smell." She headed back to the couch.

“Look, this is all part of Fun Julia, okay? This is the same Julia who tickles you to get you up out of bed, and tries to pull off Metallica, and walks around the apartment in underwear with little frogs on it.”

“Well Fun Julia’s nastier than I thought.”

“Not fair,” said Julia. It was the first time in the whole conversation that she sounded at all serious.

“Sorry. I didn’t mean that as a moral judgement or anything. But, like, that was a huge, bubbly-ass murder fart. I honestly would have guessed you shit a little.”

Julia sighed. “In that case, everyone’s nasty.”

“Yeah, okay.” Kady was worried she’d screwed up, maybe badly. “Look. I’m sorry. I won’t, like, embarrass you, or shame you, or anything.”

Julia’s expression lightened. “You better not. What you can do is snuggle me. Unless the farts really are that bad”

“I’ll always snuggle you.” She felt dumb saying  _ snuggle _ , but it was the right word for the way she and Julia would curl up together.

Julia made a face, and a second later, Kady smelled why she’d made it.

“Wow,” said Kady, and Julia gave an exaggerated shrug.

“Honestly, yeah.” said Julia. “That’s a wow. How about we put this fine ass--” she gave a little shake “--under a blanket for tonight.”

Kady smiled. “You’re ridiculous.”

“Fun Julia,” said Julia, and took her spot on the couch next to Kady.

  
  


**Author's Note:**

> There's a side of Julia that shows up on the show, usually around Q, but that we don't see much because her storyline never lets her relax. I hope I managed to capture it.


End file.
